I’ve been dealing with food addiction for over 40 years. It used to be so tied in with my low self esteem and poor self image that it could only allow me to look some version of me being perfect to even be OK. When that was true, all I wanted to do was think I looked OK and then everything would be fine. And since I never could really look OK, the distraction of the addiction served my crazy purpose – to feel badly about myself.
Now I have quite good self esteem and self image. My self questioning and self judgment about how I look or what I think and do is very rare. That is not to say I think everything I do is perfect. It is to say that everything I do is just OK with me. I trust that I have a lot to offer and I trust that I will not always do what is popular or what works. So what? Before, all I needed to do was be perfect. Now all I need to do is be myself.
I’ve been maintaining around a 40-50 pound weight loss for 4 years or so. I got rid of all clothes that I 
can trick myself into thinking I haven’t gain with; the slightly bigger ones that would then allow weight gain to surprise me. That was an old subconscious trick of mine. Now my clothes keep fitting and I’m bored with them. Isn’t that lovely?
Now all my clothes fit; my scale is correct and now I have to self coach. I have to self talk. I have to provide the support for myself that I provide my clients; the support that ultimately they will have to offer themselves. I have to find the part of me that loves myself enough to get over it - whatever it might be in the moment.
I’m like the man in Beautiful Mind who just decided that he would live with the delusions that his mental illness gave him and not medicate himself with the less-than-satisfactory drugs he was prescribed. I accept that sometimes this food addiction will walk along with me. I just need to acknowledge it, not resist it, and act in my best interests – not its. Ultimately we all coach ourselves – even the life coaches.
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December 10, 2011 | Tags: food addiction, life coaching, low self esteem
Category: feelings and emotions
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For anyone with food issues, I highly recommend Martha Beck’s book “The Four Day Win”. It’s full of DOABLE strategies that you need to commit to for only four days at a time.
Dr. Arlene Taveroff
Maia,
You are absolutely gorgeous in your photo. Regardless of body size, any viewer sees the beautiful smile, warmth in your eyes, and a relaxed sense of wisdom. Good for you! And good for any of us knowing you and/or getting to know you.
I learned in Course in Miracles that it is all in perception. One reminder in the course is that people who are sleepwalking through life must come to realize that “nothing is as it appears to be”, especially when we perceive a lack or a not good enough. Well, I think my perception is clear and I see you as I mentioned above.
If we don’t like what we perceive, we really have a choice to choose again, perceive differently, and perceive in a manner that is best for our soul, best for our path. I know that may sound easier than it is, yet we can just choose again, change our thoughts. Whether it takes 12 steps, a life coach, mind training or learning lessons in this school of life -we all have the right and obligation (to ourselves) to perceive in a way that is best for our happiness.
Your life coach skills, innate wisdom, and easy communication helps others to perceive with our highest self in mind. Thanks!
Brenda
I recently saw the movie A Beautiful Mind too. I was just thinking this morning about the point in the movie when he realized that his ‘friends’ weren’t real. He saw that the little girl never changed. So often we have hold onto a mindset that we were given as children and that mindset also isn’t real and it never changes either. It doesn’t grow when we grow and it keeps trying to pull us back to the way things were. Like the character we have to recognize that even though those thoughts remain with us, they aren’t real. They are products of an unproductive (even counterproductive) mindset.