Relationship Communication
Darn! After so many years together and so much love, I can still act like a creep. Yesterday the Martian came home after work. . .
A word about his work. He is 75 and started teaching Physics at an inner city high school at age 70! He gets up each morning by 4:30, leaves the house by 6:00 and gets home most days between 4:30 and 5. Although financial adversity pushed him into this, it turns out he loves it and loves the kids.
Anyway, my part in making this career work for him is to make his lunch and breakfast and provide whatever support I can. With good relationship communication, I remind him of his purpose and the rewards he gets even when it is hard. Sometimes he is just tired and I can help by throwing around ideas with him on how to get the kids involved and learning.
OK. Back to yesterday. When the Martian came home I was washing the dishes for what seemed like the millionth time. I want him to empty his lunchbox when he comes in so I can wash the containers he 
uses for salad and dressing. Sometimes he does it right away; sometimes not. But I was fighting with feeling very put upon and tired and grumpy so grumpiness is what came out when he didn’t do it the right away. Oy!
If you read 10 Secrets to Keeping Your Relationship Working Happily Ever After - you know that I had to employ several secrets if I wanted good relationship communication:
Secret #1 – Who is most important?
Secret #4 – Communicate appropriately.
Secret #5 – A matter of respect.
Secret #8 – The small stuff vs. the big stuff.
Secret #10 – Take responsibility.
But doing all of that (which I did as quickly and as well as I could) is what both of us have done for the 25 years we are together and it’s why we can proudly say we are “living happily ever after.”
Click here and watch the Three Magic Secrets Movie for free – a free self-help ebook!
December 8, 2011 | Tags: happy marriages, marriage advice, relationship communication
Category: relationships & relationship tips
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Maia and I are so different. After reading this post of hers I get reminded for the umpteenth time that she is bothered by a lot of things. I used to think that it was better to just ignore stuff that bothers you and certainly that behavior is in the Martian DNA. I also used to think that I wanted a wife who was like that and could keep a stiff upper lip or suck it in or all the other cool ways to not complain.
That could be defined as a low maintenance wife as compared to a high maintenance wife.
Which is the best?
For me, it’s a totally obvious decision; I want a high maintenance wife. End of story.
You two are simply awesome! Thanks for sharing your lives.
What a wonderful relationship! You both give and take to make the relationship work. It is not fake, you don’t pretend. It is the real thing! I love you both for sharing. I have so much to learn from the both of you. Thank you!