I came by my good self esteem the long, hard way.
I left my parents home with such damaged self esteem that I left for a marriage that would take 19 years and recreated a more challenging experience than even my childhood was for me – and further eroding my self esteem. But something magical happened when I left my dysfunctional life at age 37. The beginnings of feeling good about who I am started to blossom.
That was over 28 years ago and I live most days now feeling quite wonderful about who I am and my positive contributions 
to the planet. That’s what good self esteem feels like to me. It encompasses me as a relationship-haver, me as a life coach, teacher and writer. It includes all areas of my life. One of the most recent areas for me to feel good about is my physical self. I love how I look even though I’m almost 66 and have the body of a healthy 66-year-old. I love my naturally silver-tinted hair, and I love how I dress.
I was just putting makeup on for an event I’m attending a bit later in the day and I had a realization that it would be a simple jump from how I feel about how I look to wanting to experience what feeling good about how I looked at a younger age would be. It seems like a simple leap to thinking about the results of plastic surgery. And I’ve been pretty judgmental about women who have plastic surgery – who try to hold back the reality of aging – and there I was contemplating it.
Darn! No matter what I judge, I find myself being it or thinking about it or wanting it sometime soon later. What is that? Karma?
October 23, 2009 | Tags: life coach, marriage, self esteem | trackback
Category: personal growth, self esteem
Wow can I relate to that! I’ve had some very powerful events happen in my life that were exactly what you described, finding myself in the exact same situations that I had judged severely in others in the past.
Now I am very careful when I find myself in a
judgemental mood. It’s usually a warning for me to take a look at myself and a message to ask myself where there are underlying fears or unresolved stuff that need to be dealt with!
I was in a consultation with a family law client the other day. My barrister stopped the client in the middle of her describing how difficult things were for her, going through a divorce at this stage of her life. My counsel remarked how much the client’s self esteem had come along since we last spoke to her. It was like a small sapling begining to grow. As time has passed her confidence has grown and it is clear to all those around her.
Getting to self confidence is a tough fulfilling journey.
zoom
http://www.divorcehelp.me
A very true saying…we are of course all human but the ideal says that people who matter don’t judge and people who judge don’t matter. When I find myself judging I try and see what it is about me that is reacting that way to that person…usually it is something with me.
T
If you want it it’s a desire. In this post more youthful appearance is what you want and that’s what most everyone else wants too.
To fulfill that desire I’ve developed a Fountain of Youth with my Fun-in fitness program, which is simply based on feeling good. That is, feel as good as possible before you start doing something and whenever any kind of pain starts, you need to make an adjustment to stop and heal the pain and feel as good or better than before you started.
Doing exactly that I trained to run the Phoenix marathon in Jan 2009. A couple of months of fun-in training at 57 and I truly feel 21 again. Now I have to see how far I can go in the direction of actually changing my physical appearance of 57 to a younger age.
You know how you feel changes your appearance and so what if you could keep on making yourself feel better and better, wouldn’t your appearance have to follow suit?? The only question you might have about the fun-in procedure is how can/do I keep on making myself feel better and better?
The simple, natural fun-in procedure itself, makes you feel better and better. But in order to feel really good beforehand (in “The First Place”) you need a completely healthy diet and lifestyle, which includes a meditation practice that makes you feel totally blissful.