Comments on: Married and Sex

By: Joan Price

Joan Price — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 23:09:40 +0000

I’m one of those senior sex advocates — I wrote a book about it and am interviewed by the media frequently. I talk about quality — not quantity — of sexual interaction. That’s what leaves us smiling and satisfied.

As we get older, we don’t have the same biological imperative to have sex as much as possible, and it takes us longer to become aroused and satisfied. So we start valuing the quality (both physical and emotional) of sex without competing with young folks about frequency.

We go for long, slow, intimate sex play — maybe most of the afternoon! — with lots of cuddling and laughing after we’re both satisfied.

Joan Price

Author of Better Than I Ever Expected: Straight Talk about Sex After Sixty

By: Jen

Jen — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 13:33:12 +0000

I love that you are so honest! I’ve been with my (younger) man for 10 years, but we don’t live together, and we are as “active” as ever… Maybe that’s the secret – live apart and only meet up when you really want to, ha ha!

By: Martian0511

Martian0511 — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 09:11:28 +0000

To me this is a long and kind of confusing post. I am not sure what the bottom line is here. It seems like this is describing sex from the (what it used to be like, what happened, and what it’s like now) perspective.

When I was a teenager I heard an older person (I think it was a preacher) in his sermon using the metaphor of a garden and in the beginning of a relationship, sex is the first flower that blooms in the garden and so you are aware of it a lot and you pay a lot of attention to it and make it very important. After so many years there are other flowers in the garden like children, family and so on so that the sex flower is still there but because it is not the only one, it does not get the same attention.

It’s a nice metaphor but I don’t buy it, I want it all. I mean I want all the other flowers in the garden and I want the sex flower as well and I want it to always be important and worthy of attention. I am not 100% sure of how to do that but I am willing to keep trying and changing things and, in fact, what is life about anyway?

I guess to sum it up, we will have sex as often as we can and know that maybe now it’s a little less goal-oriented except that we know it leads to deeper and deeper intimacy and more and more willingness to speak about things that might have been uncomfortable in the past.