I recently had the opportunity to appreciate my own insight into my life coaching tools. These tools that I use to help others I have a process by which I use them. For many reasons I learned why I must stick with these tools.
In a social networking environment online, I met another coach. Her work is completely different than mine. She helps people who are reluctant to network and sell. Well, we were chatting on the phone and learning what we each do and thinking about how we could help each other when I got an idea. We could coach each other. She needs help with her relationship with an in-law and I had not been able to come up with a way to network in-person locally that worked for me. I was in the financial services business in the past and found the cold-calling part highly uncomfortable. More recently I have attended local networking groups and have found them either uncomfortable or unfruitful.The other life coach, lets call her Meg, has a very challenging relationship with her daughter-in-law. It was a great idea to help each other out. I soon realized that I could not rush my life coaching tools into the situations. We needed to take our time and get to know each other and follow what I know works when coaching someone on deep issues.
Turns out Meg gave me a brilliant idea to start my own networking group via meetup.com and I have and the first meeting is next week and it seems that it has gone over very will from the people who’ve joined and are going to attend. So basically my issue appears to be solved. But hers is bigger and will likely take her longer to master.
In an unconscious attempt at trying to help her quickly so our situations and the help we provided each other wouldn’t feel so out of balance, I hurried my process which often includes telling stories of examples of how things worked for me or others – as a teaching tool. But I swamped her with stories in a short period of time. Fortunately, we both realized this error and have come up with a possible solution. We are both comfortable with open, clean communication (a sign of a highly functioning coach), so I have no doubt this will work out fine.
I commit to remember my own life coaching tools that works and can’t be pushed or pulled for a friend or another life coach or anyone. That doesn’t mean there isn’t flexibility but rather all the parts need to happen to honor each person’s special situation.